Lady Bug

Na sad ako.  Nag-email sa kin friend ni ladybug sa California.  She was asking what happened to ladybug.. Parang pagexplain ko what happened, nalulungkot ulit ako. 

Sis, sayo lang ako nakakapag-open.. sa yo ako nakakaiyak.

I was in the middle of a happy conversation with friends when I received this text last night.  I pause for a while and took a deep breath.  The smile on my face was replaced instantly.

It takes  a supernatural strength to find courage to move on and accept things that happened in your life only to find out that a single memory will bring you to the same scene and you will see yourself back at square one.  The hurt brought about by death of a loved-one takes time to heal.

My mind turned to Rowell.  Everytime I hear somebody asking me to share what happened… in my mind this is what actually happening..

Mind :   Here we go again…
Heart:  Is it okay with you to share it once again?
Mind:    Hope this is the last time I'll be sharing this.  Cause it will take a hard time for me to make an upstart again.
Heart:  Don't be sad.  Sometimes, you need to share stories.  Others might learn something not on the manner in which it was shared but on the toughness in you to deliver that.
Mind:    Acceptance.
Heart:  Yes.

My message to a friend:

Everytime you'll be tasked to tell stories about Lady Bug, always bear in mind that she might be just around the corner watching how you would enumerate what happened.  She would surely be sad to see you crying.