The Happy Me

 God is so good to me.  He didn't allow me to dwell much on the anticipated "sadness".  There were no rooms left in me to think of the sad thoughts. 

I was thinking earlier…

"God, bakit naman kung kailan kailangan ko ang oras para naman sa sarili ko, I need to set it aside and think of others again… I need to ignore what I am feeling to give happiness to others.  Paano naman ako?"

Then I went to the EB Party and there was never a time that I felt sad… God gave me an overflowing moments of happiness.

This is His way of telling me…

You don't have to be sad. 
I have given you bountiful gifts to be happy. 
The gift of love coming from the people you love and love you. 
The ability to love others, uniquely of Sheggz.

Smile… I created you to smile and share smiles.  That's what sets you apart.

The Sheggz that no matter what happens… remains happy and smiling.

You, too, are ASTIG… the type who doesn't have to brag that being ASTIG.

Your being bubbly, astig and timang is contagious….
continue making others happy for being the best Sheggz that you are…

People will love you because you're YOU.

They see something in YOU… that they never found in others.

Happy New Year to everyone!

Anything Goes

It all started with a text message from Gege:

"Sheggz, wala bang EB ang Sidekicks?"

My mind ran fast to think of how to organize an event in a very short span of time.  I immediately texted them and sent rush invites…  I got nervous to receive late replies and some are backing out… not that they don't want to but they weren't here in Manila…. Due to Christmas season, a lot is having their vacation in their own respective provinces… and some are out of the country.

A real "Anything Goes, Nothing Much Has Been Planned" was the one in my mind.  No plans at all.  I was sooo happy to see old friends…. really happy in that gathering.  My first time to see Debs, Gurly and JP and the rest of the newcomers and Gege, too, in a real makulit mode… Was sooo speechless to see them like that.  I am very happy up to now.  Natalo ako sa kulit… ako ang natameme… the Bubbly Sheggz was caught unaware of the happy faces.

On our way home…. I keep on asking myself…

Hehehe Aba… ano bang nangyari at naging ganoon kasaya ang lahat?

Kahit ako… sobrang ang saya!  Ang kulit kulit kulit ng lahat..

Naisip ko … masaya kasi akong ginawa ang bagay na ito.  Masaya talaga ako.

This was not my first time to organize an EB but this was extremely different…. really!

Debs told me…

"Ate Sheggz, this reminds me of a lot of similar things and memories…" 

I smiled…

In my heart I know, I missed similar events like these… being around with friends…  I smiled because… I know for sure… I never lost any… I even gain more!

So glad to be happy, free and be me!

To Gege and the Sidekicks… I am sooo happy to have spent the night of makulits with you… more in the coming months… See you soon!  Very Very Soon!

To get to know more of what I am writing here… visit http://www.gretchenmalalad.i.ph

It all started with being a fan… and look at what happened… aren't we real good friends?

You will see real smiles in Sheggz… ;-)

The Warrior Princess

I saw the gates wide opened so I get in. 
My steps are getting heavier.
I put down the steel mask I am wearing.

I looked around. I saw a crowd dressed elegantly…
in their faces, you will just how happy they are to be there. 

My heart knows only one person that even at a distance I can recognize him.

I smiled and silently whispered… “You look terribly great, my Prince.”

The Prince saw me. He smiled.

He came closer and said. 

“Do I look like a real Prince, my Princess?”

“Yes, you are,” I said.

“I came to witness your wedding.  I just want to see just how you prepared for this.” 

"What can you say?"

"It's awesome. I know you're happy."

Then the Prince asked…. 

"Are you?" 

And I never answered.

Then I saw the Princess, the union is about to start.  
The Prince said, "I hope you'll be happy, too. Someday"

I nod and wear my mask again.

The Prince took the hand of the Princess and glanced at me.

That castle is no longer mine.

It belongs to my Prince and his Charming Princess.

I can never go back to the place I called Land of the Loving.

Because I am no longer allowed to.

The union marks the closing of the gates.

The exchange of I Do’s vanished all the powers of the magic word cast upon us.

The keys were no longer in my hands, I gave it to the Prince.

Until the last minute, I wish I was the one reciting the vows.

As I lock the last gate, I stopped for a while and gave my one last look at the Castle I built for 5 long years. The Castle I built… to house the lucky Princess.

I know for a fact, that in that castle, I carefully left my heart and entrust it in the hands of the Prince.  That’s the only reason why the Warrior Princess came.

Now I am taking a graceful exit.

Taking a new journey… this is the FINAL FANTASY.

If you look inside a girl's heart and see how much she cries
You'll find secrets, promises and lies
But what you'll see most is how hard she tries to stay strong
when nothing is right and everything's wrong.

Things that make me smile

Just before the day ends, i got a ym message from my Besku that she sent a christmas e-card.  So I immediately opened the link to find out.

Was really touched. Here it is… i cropped it one by one so I could share it with you.

What makes me smile?

The love of the people I love… 

My real friends who I've known for years who up to now I'm sharing one of the finest friendships in the world.

Besku… thanks for always reminding me of Angels Sent!

May we surpass the 80 years of Friendship of Pooh and Piglet, ha?!

Merry Christmas! 

80 Years of Friendship ;-)

As promised, I went back to SM Megamall to take pictures of the Hundred Akre Wood.  In celebration of Winnie the Pooh’s 80 Years of Friendship, many different cute and huggable Poohs and Pooh items are displayed on the hallway and inside the department store.  I am soooooo happy that my birthday coincides with Pooh’s celebration whehehe. So in every mall I visit, it always reminds me of dual celebration of Pooh and Sheggz the Pooh.  Ang galing galing!

The Symbol of 80 Years of Friendship

This is the entrance to the Hundred Akre Wood

Winnie the Pooh and Sheggz the Pooh

Mr. Sanders' House 

Winnie the Pooh's House 

Pooh's Thotful Spot - This is where He plays with Pooh's Circle of Friends

 Piglet's House 

The Cutie-cute-cute

Every time I see Pooh and the many Poohs around, I can’t help but to giggle and feel young at heart again. I roam around the stalls and visit every Pooh I see.  I laugh every time I see a new and unique Pooh bear.  Hehehehe ang kulit!

As if it’s always the first time to see a huggable bear.  As in kinikilig talaga ako hehehe!  Now I know the feeling of children making kulit with their parents to buy them toys…

I came closer to a box containing many Poohs inside.  While busy touching and hugging each and every bear I see, I felt something strange… it's as if, there's someone I know, who is watching over me… I looked around.. I see no familiar face… then, my eyes landed on the corner where i see… another cute Pooh that winks … hehehe

Oist Sheggz… Oist!
Halu! Okay ka ba dyan? Come here, meron pang mas makulit sa akin dito.. hehehe

So I went closer to that winking Pooh… He introduced me to…. Jaraaaannnn!

Sleeping Pooh and Baby Winking Pooh hehehe with Piglet hiding. 

Sheggz, pahinga muna ako, antagal ko na kayang nagpapacute jan. 

Si Santa Pooh anjan, naisilid sa bag… ang kulit at ang likot - likot kasi.. hahaha

Ang nanalong Pooh na nakipag-wrestling sa maraming bears

I Love You POOH!

Happy 80 Years!

Kulit! 

Letting go of the Groom

To “let go” is to fear less, and love more.

This particular line hit me. 

In carefully assessing myself on the process of letting go of someone, it has been very easy for me to say that after this, I will never allow anybody to hurt me as much as I have been hurt…

but why?

Does it mean I am blaming myself for allowing it to happen to finally make a recourse to have a heart as hard and as strong as steel?  If that's the case, then I haven't learned anything from it.

Tsk Tsk Tsk 

When taking risk in loving, no one has to be blame if it doesn't work that well.  There's a wider room for everybody where we could all fit in.  

A guy asked me while we were dancing, "Are you willing to take risks again?"

I answered…

"Yes, but not now.  Not tomorrow but soon I'll be.  I know it's very very soon.  The coping stage is a lot faster than I expect it to be.  But when I'm ready… I know I'll be happy.  Cause now I know how to take full responsibility and accountability of LOVE and of LOVING.  It has never been the same Sheggz in terms of this… I'm working on being more compassionate and responsible.  Loving, is not just feelings, it is far more than that.  It's not just the ring that I'll be wearing nor the elegant wedding that I wish to have…

it's working on the BEST US to produce LITTLE BEST US in the future.  While preparing myself to be complete and deserving, the other half is doing the same.  Isn't it nice and exciting?  I learned a lot from this heartache… really.  To put love in proper perspective and to put myself in the most proper place where I should really be.  That's the best thing I did this year.  It may be sad for now but it can stand as a mere fulfillment, too.  That love was never selfish… never… Now, I'm more careful when telling "I LOVE YOU"… it should come from the heart.  I won't tell it to anybody, even with friends and families, if I didn't mean it… cause when I do… you know it's real."

That's for me is the best lesson I got from Letting Go of the Groom…

And to my friends who know me, and even the groom, himself (hehehe) who are so concerned  with how I'm coping right now and bothered of my being silent and aloof. 

Don't worry… I'm happy…. Ako pah?!

MERRY CHRISTMAS….

I WISH YOU LOVE

and a HAPPY HEART!  

The Best Kind of Love

   I've been browsing the net for articles and poems about Letting Go.  There are actually many links that pointed me to what I need.  There are a few that touched my heart as well… 

This one's from Daryl-Marie. 

We may think that the guy we love is the only one that is worth it for us. But I must say that having a broken heart is just a part of life, one that must be endured and overcome. However, it is pointless to stay that way. "Love" does not mean holding on to feelings and being "devoted" to someone you couldn't have anyway; it is wanting what's best for the other person, even if it means that you don't get what you want. That's not to say that the pain shouldn't exist, or that it will fade away just like that, but true love desires the happiness of the one you love. I must admit that I am still recovering, but I am truly happy for Nate. All I want is for his best. Now, if I had realized this beforehand, I could have saved that piece of my heart for someone else–someone who will share a life with me in a union so beautiful that I will cry tears of joy at the thought of it, as opposed to the tears of pain that have lead me to where I sit right now.

Full article at this link.

Letting Go Takes Love

To let go does not mean to stop caring, it me ans I can't do it for someone else.
To let go is not to cut myself off, it's the realization I can't control another.
To let go is not to enable, but allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means  the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to try to change or blame another, it's to make the most of myself.
To let go is not to care for, but to care about.
To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
To let go is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, 
but to allow others to affect their destinies.
To let go is not to be protective, it's to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny, but to accept.
To let go is not to nag, scold or argue,
but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires,
but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.
To let go is not to criticize or regulate anybody,
but to try to become what I dream I can be.
To let go is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
To let go is to fear less and love more.
Remember:  The time to love is short.

(author unknown)

Friends Forever

Last night, after coming from a very serious client meeting, I went straight to Megamall to watch the premiere night of Shake Rattle and Roll 8, not to relax but to be scared.  I was walking in Mega A when I saw a familiar scene… I went closer to that place… and I was right… it’s Winnie the Pooh’s Hundred Akre Wood.  There were big pictures of Pooh and a mini playground for kids and adults.  I was so eager to come in but there were some rules that I need to buy this and that and get a coupon.  Grrr… and I need to go upstairs for the movie.  Right after watching, I saw again a big statue of Pooh standing at the gates of Megamall… it’s as if telling me…

“Hoy Sheggz!  Ako nga ito! Si Pooh!”

I ran fast to hug him and I’m shouting hahahaha.  I forgot that it was a statue, not the soft huggable bear I know… *toink!  But just the same, I hugged him sooo tight…

Was so happy to hug and take pictures with him… Reunion of Pooh and Pooh!  Here are the pics… Next time, I’ll post the 100 Akre Wood at Megamall.

Christmas in our Hearts

Christmas is coming in 6 days.

Where everyone's so busy preparing for christmas rush… buying gifts for friends and families.. there are some families grieving on the loss of someone special in their lives… trying helplessly to celebrate the christmas despite the very odd feeling.  I saw this in Rated K… a mom lost her favorite son, Charles.  When she was asked about this… she said…

 Hindi kumpleto ang buhay ng isang Ina… sa pagkawala ng Anak.
Hindi ko talaga feel ang Christmas ngayon…
pero magkaganunpaman, itutuloy pa rin ng aming pamilya ang Pasko. 

And I remember, my friend, Matto… who once or twice told me…

"Hindi ko talaga ma-feel ang Pasko ngayon. Parang ang hirap hirap icelebrate".   

How about Rowel's family in Ilocos?  How are they coping? 

May all those who are grieving find refuge in the loving arms of God.  That they be assured that the special people who will never be part of Noche Buena and Media Noche in the coming holidays, are happy celebrating in heaven.  And it pains them to see us not happy.

In our hearts, let's reserve a special place for them… Merry Christmas, Minette, Rowel, Theresa, Bombie, etc.