The Best Remark

I personally witnessed just how overwhelming the responses were from families, friends, relatives, teachers, school/classmates, colleagues, orgmates, neighbors and even people we hardly know upon hearing Rov’s passing the bar. 

Until wee hours of the night we were receiving domestic and overseas calls.  My brother and I were talking about it on our way home and we, ourselves, were so amazed at how these people extended their greetings.   

To those who personally know us, they know exactly just how Rovs and the whole family hurdled this.  It wasn’t easy but it’s all worth it.     

I’ve been talking sincerely to Rovs on how he should use his ability and privilege to serve, not just to earn.  Make yourself a servant… make use of the opportunity to serve… 

It’s the same advice my lolo and lola shared to him.  I can’t recall it fully but the essence revolves around it.  What touched me the most was when Rovs held Ama’s hands and said, “Ama, abogado na po talaga ako…” and Ama replied, “Salamat Salamat at naabutan ko pa.  Salamat!” 

That’s basically what Ama Turing had all been wishing… For him to see Totoy Ovel… Atty. Ovel.

What made this experience extra special… it made us One in Spirit.. the whole family.. One in Faith and Prayers… It was one perfect example of  "Walang Iwanan ang Team Kapamilya!" 

And just this morning, when I got to chat with Rovs, I was laughing out loud when he left a ym msg to me… “Ate, atty na nga ako!  Hindi halata… wala pa rin akong pera! Hahahahaha” 

Congratulations Rovs!  I got one of the best remarks from Lolo that I will never ever forget..

“Salamat Ate!  You’ve always been the Best Ate!”<Daig ko pa ang pumasa sa bar>

Signs Nya :)

Nang magkaharap-harap kaming magkakapamilya, masaya at hagalpakan sa tawa.  Kanya kanyang toink-able moments ang bawat isa.  Sayang at walang videocam nun na pwedeng icapture ang mga nakakatawang moments. 

Kanya-kanyang kwentuhan ng magkakaibang signs.   

Tuesday morning – may nanggitgit sa aming white L3 sa may Osmena Highway habang papasok kami ni Ovel sa trabaho.  Malapit na ciang mainis at pinlano nang tapatan sa stop light ang nanggitgit na sasakyan… Sakto, pagtapat nung L3 sa kaliwa, nakasulat sa gilid neto “God answers prayers!”.  Nagkatinginan kaming dalawa sabay sabi niya, “Ate, ito kaya ang sign?” <sabay goosebumps>. 

Arangkada ulit.  Pagtigil ulit sa stop light, nasa gawing kanan na namin cia, at ang nakasulat naman sa kabilang side “Blessed are those who entrust everything to the Lord.”.  Nasabi ko na sa kanya, “Kaya tayo ginigitgit, para mabasa natin un!”…  

Wednesday – Baclaran Church.  Dahil sa dami ng tao, hindi ko agad natingnan ang altar.  Tungo agad ako para magdasal.  Nung nasa aisle na kami papuntang altar, nabasa ko ang malaking malaking letters na “ALLELUIA” <sabay goosebumps ulit> 

Thursday – St. Jude.  Ito nga yung finale nang “I Will Sing Forever” ng Bukas Palad. 

Saturday – Sa pagtitirik namin ng maraming kandila sa Baclaran, tanging kong sinabi … “sana Lord, sa dami ng kandilang ito… ung liwanag ang gagabay sa amin para sa huling tagumpay ni Rovs.  Bago mag-alas dos ng hapon, papunta kaming elevator palabas ng parking lot… pag-akyat naming sa escalator ng MOA, napapikit ako dahil sa nasilaw ako sa sobrang liwanag at init na sumalubong sa amin paakyat.  Noon, tumulo ang luha ko… ilang segundo lang, nakatanggap na kami ng balita na “pasado cia”…. Iyon ang naging dahilan bakit napahagulhol ako ng iyak sa parking lot.  

Sa dami ng signs na hiningi ko… hanggang sa kahuli-hulihang sandali… ramdam na ramdam ko… 

Si Daddy pala noon ang sign na hiningi, pag may pumutok na balloon sa children’s party sa tapat ng bahay, iyon ang sign nya na pasado… 4:10pm ng hapon, 3 magkakasunod na pumutok na balloons ang nagpagulat sa kanya… saktong pagbalita namin kay Mader nang magandang balita… 

Halos isang buong lingo ng makapanindig-balahibong signs…

# 869

Maituturing kong isang Praning na Sabado ang March 29, 2008.  Magkakasama kami pero walang nagsasalita at halos anlalim ng mga iniisip.  Nang nakaramdam ng gutom, salamat sa KFC na malapit sa Baclaran Church. Dasal ulit pagkatapos.  Nang mahimasmasan ng kaunti, diretso naman ng MOA para magpalamig, pero tulad ng dati, wala pa ring nagsasalita.  Literal ung feeling na najejebs na nasusuka na nahihilo na kinikilabutan na halos gusto mong maghapong maluha na lang habang lakad ng lakad… magkakasama kami pero ilang beses kami nagkawalaan pero wala ni isa sa amin ang nabothered na maghanap.  Praning!  Nasa loob ako ng mall pero naghahanap ako ng sinag ng araw para magpainit.  Nang mag-aalas-dos, kinailangan naming bumalik ng Baclaran Church para sa huling dasal… ilang beses na halos kami muntik-muntikan nang maaksidente. 

Iyakan na kami magkapatid sa parking lot ng MOA.  Nang mga sandaling iyon, wala kaming mapaghugutan ng lakas kundi ung nasa Itaas.  Pagkatapos magdasal, diretso ng Robinsons-Ermita, magpapark dapat, pero in the end, inikot lang namin ang parking lot, nagbayad ng P30.00 para lang magpaikot-ikot.  Aksaya sa parking, aksaya pa sa gasolina.  Diretso ng Max Orosa.  Naghihintay.  Nang magaalas-kwatro ng hapon, inutusan akong pumunta ng Supreme Court para tingnan ang resulta. Putek! Nasa gate palang ako ng Supreme Court, tumawag si Joyce, nagtext na si JP, tumawag na rin ang kapatid ko.  Nagsasabing pasado ang kapatid ko.  Pero putek!  Akong nasa mismong Supreme Court, hindi ko nakikita ang pangalan ng kapatid ko.  Itinext ko na sa buong pamilya ko na PASADO cia kahit hindi ko pa NAKIKITA!  Ang sabi kasi, maniwala ka kahit hindi mo pa nakikita…Naglalakad ako na halos sagasain ko na ang mga taong nasa harap ko makita lang ang papel… luha, pawis at sipon lang ang dala dala ko nun…  Sa inis ko, nakita ko ung 3 malaking projector na dun pala idinidisplay ang pangalan… pagdating na sa letter N, nagstop!  at nagrestart! Napamura talaga ako… ung feeling na magalta-presyon!  Nang makita ko mismo sa sarili ko, hindi ang apelyido kundi ang pangalan.. napasigaw talaga ako! "Thanks God! Kapatid ko yan!!"   Akala tuloy ng tv reporter, ako ay isang barista na pumasa… lapit agad para sa interview… saka lang ako tinamaan ng hiya na .. "hindi po ako kumuha ng exam hehehehe".

Txt magkabi-kabila, iyak dito, singhot dun, pawis dito, tapilok dun!  In short, ng mga panahong iyon, dugyutin at wa-poise si Ate !!! My goodness! Weno ngayon!  hahaha  Kanya-kanyang jologs nang mga oras na iyon… may pinipicturean ang pangalan, may nagpapapicture sa harap ng projector, may umatungal ng lakas na lakas at gumawa ng eksena hahaha

Haaay!!! Congratulations Atty Ovel! 

To God Be All the Glory!!

That one final song :)

Goosebumps Goosebumps Goosebumps!  That’s what I am having everytime I go to church and pray for my brother.  It’s still the same goosebumps I’m having right now when I started out writing.  I’m quite irritated that I am not nervous and bothered.  Yesterday, we went to St. Jude Thaddeus Parish in Mendiola with my brother and his girlfriend.  But I decided to take a different seat away from them.  There I saw the crucifix.  I told myself, if in that mass, the final song I’d be hearing will be my favorite song, I should be glad that in my heart I know my prayers had already been answered.  God will speak to me through that song…  

The mass went along.  The reading and homily made me smile.  We believe when we see it.  The priest told everyone, to barristers inside this Church, claim now that you have already passed.  Be positive.  Claim God’s Victory now!  I smiled again, for it made reminded me of the previous blog I wrote.  I was waiting for the final song of the mass only to know that the novena is part of the mass and it has just started.  I forgot to bring my booklet, instead I just continue praying.  When the novena has ended, the priest had proclaim his last words… honestly, I almost forgot that I am waiting for something.  The Final Blessing has already been granted.  There I stood waiting for the Holy Water to be poured!  I was surprised to have received so many drops hehehehe… Then I look at the crucifix again… still praying… then I heard the intro of a song…. I had that one big smile on my face coz I knew that song very very very very well… And I am teary-eyed while singing my favorite Bukas Palad song. 

I WILL SING FOREVER OF YOUR LOVE, OH LORD

I WILL CELEBRATE THE WONDER OF YOUR NAME.

FOR THE WORD THAT YOU SPEAK IS A SONG OF FORGIVENESS

AND A SONG OF GENTLE MERCY AND OF PEACE. 

LET US WAKE AT THE MORNING AND BE FILLED WITH YOUR LOVE

AND SING SONGS OF PRAISES ALL OUR DAYS.

FOR YOUR LOVE IS AS HIGH AS THE HEAVENS ABOVE US

AND YOUR FAITHFULNESS AS CERTAIN AS THE DAWN. 

I WILL SING FOREVER OF YOUR LOVE O LORD

FOR YOU ARE MY REFUGE AND MY STRENGTH

YOU FILL THE WORLD WITH YOUR LIFE GIVING SPIRIT

THAT SPEAKS YOUR WORD

YOUR WORD OF MERCY AND OF PEAACE. 

AND I WILL SING FOREVER OF YOUR LOVE, O LORD

YES, I WILL SING FOREVER OF YOUR LOVE — 

LORD.

I looked at my brother, gave one assuring pat on his shoulder and said, “Rovs, I am very confident, you will pass.”  I was still teary-eyed when I said it but in bliss J  

To God be all the Glory!!!

God’s Victory

It’s 12:21am.  Still at the office keeping myself busy.  It’s Thursday already… one more night to go and the agony of waiting the results of the bar examination will soon be over.
To be honest, I’ve found myself praying and praying and praying since the time my brother went to law school, till he graduated and took the bar exams last September 2007 until today.  I still couldn’t figure out whether I am feeling scared about something or feeling scared that I am not scared and nervous about it.
We were in Baclaran Church earlier.  There we stood silently and prayed fervently.  This is I guess one of the most sincere prayers I’ve asked of God… strength of faith for my brother and for the entire family.  On our way to the altar, I saw "ALLELUIA" in big letters posted on top of the altar.  It was the only time I noticed that the altar seemed to be so pleasant.  In my heart, I know, everything that will happen by Friday will always be lifted up to God’s glory.  I was teary-eyed while walking the aisle… for it was one of the few moments that I find solace… everytime I have fully surrendered and entrusted my faith to God…
When it was my turn to hold the Blessed Sacrament, I had goosebumps… up until I went out of the Church.  When I turned my back, I saw my brother holding the Blessed Sacrament firmly.  One of the very few moments also that I saw him praying seriously…
Hopefully, when you land into this blog… do me a big favor… say a little prayer for my brother named Roviel Nepomuceno… that he may successfully pass the bar examination with a great zeal of renewed faith.

To God be all the Glory!!!

Awkward

Seth Godin made me think why I had to entertain the thought of feeling "awkward".  I had been into this.  Basically, a slip of the tongue or the spur of the moment normally causes that feeling to trigger.  "Awkward" is something that goes beyond the normal, isn’t it?  You might wonder why I am bothered by the word "awkward".  I am dealing with it on a constructive and positive way so I could gauge the extent of the effect and the possible counterdefense to overcome that feeling.

Normally, I walked away from that situation or the person that had made me feel "awkward" and spend a couple of time thinking why I have said it or have done that… or why, in the first place, do I have to feel that way and begin to doubt and question even the way I’m feeling… despite the simplicity of the event that triggered it.

"Why you didn’t say or do them but wish you had or maybe are glad you didn’t."

 

Awkward is something I wouldn’t want to feel towards other people or other people to feel towards me.  It’s not about putting malice of someone or of something.  I guess there’s just something within myself that has to be dealt upon or acknowledge that for quite some time I am not at ease or not willing to deal.

If it’s what that would make me feel at ease with myself… there ain’t no reason but to deal with it…

URL: http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2006/08/awkward.html

… that deadly rope

For the nth time, I heard of someone who had just ended her life.  While browsing the internet, I found a suicide poem.   The words are incredibly thought of and written.  But just like this poem, people will not truly understand why that “crime” was committed.  For them, it’s easy to say something, I hope they don’t really mean. 

Then I remembered this line… “You killed yourself and you didn’t think of me” 

I told my friend, “I told you, the world triumphs in making people feel alienated.”  She asked me several questions that I didn’t bother to reply. 

“It’s faith that’s lacking!”, I said to myself. 

Fortunate are those who went through the same stage and managed to get over and learned gradually the value of fighting for their lives and keeping whatever it is that’s more essential.  It’s not the courage that saved them, but their inner spirit calling and struggling that their “Faith” is more powerful than “hopelessness” and “fear”.
There are those inflicted with severe illness, spent millions just to live more… some even travelled abroad seeking for best medical practitioners to help them live.  Others even go to the extent of crying in front of television just to ask monetary help for them or their loved-ones to get well…

Then how come, you have the nerve to cut it short?  Isn’t that so unfair and too cruel?  

Everytime I think of it, I always put myself on just one scenario:   

Evil on the left, my guardian angel on the right, God at the center holding me, while I am about to hang myself…  

Will you, despite the many blessings that you have, trade your life over to that evil?  Would you want to see God weeping that you have disregarded faith over your worldly fears? 

Will you come with the evil?  Or will you kneel down and embrace God?   

Pray that life be lived as what God expects you to have it… Pray … Pray… Pray… 

God answers prayers! J

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Mountain

I should stop asking for signs… this is what I told myself after so many signs were revealed to me this Holy Week.  If it’s meant to happen, it will.  I got confused.  Dreams might be deceiving and so are the signs… but what if it’s revealed to me consecutively, is it still peculiar or it has something to say and confirm?

Who’ll start the conversation?  What if these are just false signs?   Will I embrace happiness or just the same, will I allow it to pass unnoticed?

On top of that mountain where fate will lead us both, right before the first ray of light, shines upon the horizon, not forced but brought in ways unexpected, where one object I have in mind will be handed to me… that’s the only time I will be convinced, that the timing is right… to be true, happy and right… and everything is mutual :)

Haay…

On Soulmates

"All of your life you have waited for the touch of true and tender Love and the ensuing ecstasy. This, dear ones, is how it’s going to be for every single human being as each accepts the Love he or she is and draws the SoulMate."

     "…you have only one SoulMate. This SoulMate is the other half of your great and glorious eternal being, the other half of the cell of My heart which you make up together. This being is that cell born into manifestation at the moment of Creation, for in that moment I became manifested. I became the expanding Creation, of which you are the heart. The essence of that moment, when thought moved upon the deep ocean of My being, was the creation of Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine."

     "…that moment, dear ones, was the Creation of SoulMates. Those two energies have now been manifested through every level. It is always the same, two halves of one cell of My heart equals SoulMates. Dear ones, this is the SoulMate I am talking about. This is who I ask you to call forth into your life. Not just your life partner. Not just your equivalent. Not just someone who will help you grow or teach you things. No! I want you to ask for your true and glorious SoulMate, your Twin Flame!"

     "…you are often looking at your SoulMate as you would look at a physical plane mate. But, My beloveds, I must tell you that this union is far bigger than anything you could ever encounter here. I encourage you to dream. Dream of everything that represents to you the greatest Love you can possibly imagine. Then I promise you, it is more. It is more than all you have ever imagined, more than the most cherished secret dreams of Love. It is more than any fairy tale, better than any possible product of your imagination. For not only is your SoulMate your equivalent in every way, but your Love together is beyond eternal."

http://www.circleoflight.net/quotes.html